Monday, December 7, 2009

Being Timid

I hate being timid and non-confrontational. I hate not knowing how, or not having the courage to speak up when someone is hurting or confiding in me. So many people are hurting and I can't seem to help them no matter how much I wish I could, sometimes I just can't get the words out. I want to knock some sense into people, help people better themselves, but being timid stops me before I can even get a word out. What if they don't like what I say? What if they want to argue with me? What if they hate me for what I say? These questions stop me before I can say anything. I want to speak up when my friends are making bad decisions, but I don't want them to hate me for it or argue over it. It hurts knowing that I have something to say but I keep it inside.

Is it really better to do the easy thing and keep my feelings inside and let them do what they are doing, or speak up and possibly help change them no matter the consequences?


  1. Pray about it. If you feel you are called to say something, say it. But be able to back up what you say and why you feel you need to. Maybe ask-would you like to hear what I think/feel about it? If you say things in love and real care about the relationship, you have courage-use it. But I have gotten into trouble sometimes by being too honest with my feelings or thoughts.

  2. You've got a wise friend. I'm sorry if our conversation the other night is what made you feel this way. A passage that really helped me is in Psalm 19:12-14. David recognized that he was falling into the error of thinking that he knew what was going to happen in the future, and acting upon that. It's called presuming. I used to be afraid of people because even before I would say anything, I would think in my mind how I assumed that they would react, and that would make me too scared to talk. You just can't let yourself think about the "maybe"s, because only God knows that. When I stopped thinking about that, the only thing I really could think on was what I know as truth, which is what has already been said and the love that I had for that person. It goes along with Phil. 4:8. That didn't get rid of all fear, but that helped a lot to think on what was right and leave the rest up to God. I love you, Rach. I'm sorry if I made you worried.

  3. sometimes you can help a person just by being there for them. i know it doesn't seem like much at the moment, but in reality your example can have a great impact on whoever you are around.

    i think it's important to realize that being timid does not mean you are any less of a person than those who can speak well. a shy person who does not have a gift for speaking verbally can walk with god in different ways that are still helpful to others.

    however, if you feel you can speak well, it takes time to overcome the fear of saying certain words...
    i think whatever you had to say to someone, it's clear that you would say it with compassion and good intentions. some people live their whole life being bold and not taking action. some people do take action, yet are still timid (and vice versa).

    anywhoozle, i guess that's it for my rambling!
    : D